SAD makes me irked

Seasonal Affective Disorder usually refers to a tendency for people to become depressed or sad during the winter holidays.

For me, it usually manifests with irritability during the summer. (Not that I am diagnosed with it. It is just a trend in my moods.)

I am not a summer kind of gal, said the person living in Hawaii for 20 years. But we're getting towards those hotter days and it's much harder to concentrate on anything.

On top of my weather-induced mood shift, there are a number of things that will make it hard to get any writing done. But I plan to try.

My aunt is coming for a long visit soon.

But, despite a nice-looking work schedule (sure I won't be able to eat for most of my Mondays and Wednesdays, but that's not really new), which affords me time to hang out with the family and rest, I'll have to be more diligent about writing.

I am finally getting into the swing of my clockwork ghost story, and I'm typing up notes for a collaborative UF with someone. [That will hopefully keep my creative juices flowing.] So I'm hoping that devoting some bus time to writing longhand, as well as setting aside time when I get home from work on Tuesdays and Thursday (when I finish work early) will help make a lot of headway on both stories.

I am also hoping that having taught here for a year, there will be less prep to do in the mornings,so I'll have time in the air conditioned office to do some writing as well.

It'll mean a lot of early mornings, which I am not prone to when the time is my own (I stayed up until 1 last night and could've stayed up later except I knew I had plans today), but the plan is those will be productive early mornings.

Anyway, so that's the update from me. Now please enjoy this random photo:

Happy New Year--2011 edition

Happy New Year, Everyone!


After midnight, after finshing a comic (X-Men graphic novel featuring Mystique, Rogue and Nightcrawler), after a shower and bed, after waking up multiple times because of phone calls and finally staying up, and after getting some coffee, it is New Year's Day. I am reading blogs.

One was written by Owl, and it got me thinking about who I am and how I define myself, how I define "happy," whether I am happy and if not, how to get there. I've only just begun to think about it, so I don't want to offer you readers a muddled, rambly mess. I know that's my mood right now.

Instead, I'll share what I originally planned to, not my resolutions (I haven't decided on those yet), but my plans for today.

I decided to start a new tradition for myself, that on the first day of the new year, I will take some time to do a little bit of everything I love or want to improve on in this year. For instance:

1. Blog (clearly need to improve that)
2. Write some new pages on Clockwork Seams (I want to finish the first draft)
3. Rewrite/revise Hounds (I have some ideas for rewriting the beginning so it doesn't jump around and to fix some other ideas, now I need to do it)
4. Clean (I have a finite space, but ever-increasing amounts of clothes, books, and paper, not good)
5. Day job stuff (I need better time-management, so a little work today is a good start)
6. Some crafting (make a necklace or sew something, I have the materials and my sewing machine is still out, why not use it?)
7. Take a walk around the neighborhood (structured exercise is exceptionally hard to me to maintain, but healthy habits are good)
8. Read a book (I haven't been in the mood for a while, but the urge is building and once I start, I probably won't be able to stop)
9. Draw (the ideas are on the top of my brain)
10. Eat some french toast (I got a hankering for it this morning, found an easy recipe and tried it out--it was okay, too much cinnamon, and I was worried about the eggs being underdone, but I cooked something I'd never made before, yay new experiences!)

So as of right now, 1 and 10 are complete, 2, 3, and 5 will probably occur later in the day, and 4 is looking like my next step. I don't plan to spend a huge amount of time on all of them, but enough to feel accomplished, I think.

Feeling productive at the end of the day is always good, in my opinion, and as I said to a friend, I think this is a good way to start the new year on a high point.

Whish leads to me ask, what are your plans for today, readers and friends?
~Sabrina

My Own Personal NaNo

So I -have- to get more writing time in. Today has not been a good example of that, but considering the number of novel drafts I've completed, I know I cna do it, which means I have no excuse.

[Note how much I have to bully myself, though?]

So I have the sorta-steampunk ghost story, "Clockwork Seams," about a girl who knows how to sew, but wants to follow in her inventor-mother's footsteps, and the ghost who follows her around, making quips and acting as guinea pig for her ghost-geared inventions.

Together they stumble upon plans to turn the ghosts of Charleton into the fuel for...something. The guy has plans centered on power and greed (don't they all? It's that or revenge). They also learn the girl's father, long thought dead, might be alive and fighting behind the scenes to stop Mr. Villain. Miriam and Ambrose are determined to stop him and find her father, the task which led to her mother's death. [You can see where my idea for the plot flounders a tad.]

As of right now, I have 2,267 words typed. I also have some pages hand-written but not transcribed. So my goal, even though I am starting six days late, is to end up with 50,000 words by December 1. When I transcribed a portion I'll mention they aren't "new" words, but I'll count them towards the total anyway. The underlying goal is to get back in the habit of writing every day. [And if I write on another story, like the YA pirate fantasy or something short for my writer's group, I'll post those numbers, too, but they won't count towards the total.]

It'll also get me back on my laptop more regularly (no more "I'm tired" as an excuse there, either!), and blogging more often; so every night, or the next morning, I'll post my word count. Beginning tonight. Expect a new post, either before I go to bed or before I leave the house tomorrow morning, with an updated word count on "Clockwork Seams." And if that number is the same, well, feel free to call me on it.

Wish me luck, and to everyone out there working on their WIPs or doing NaNo, good luck and happy writing!

Tired, but feeling good

Not a writing post, but I just finished my first official day of work. From my side of things, despite my being a bit nervous and worrying about time, the class seemed to go well.

It looked like, once we were done with the syllabus, they got into the ice breaker activity--I wanted them to have a conversation with someone they didn't know. Find out a few things, but converse instead of just asking X, Y, and Z and doing the bare minimum. I shared, too, and we laughed (with me, not at me, lol). That is a key determinant, in my view. If they're comfortable enough to joke around without being disruptive of the lesson, then I think they're more likely to pay attention.

I'm hoping that I can keep that sort of momentum going, even with "duller" topics like grammar and sentence structure.

But I made it through the day. Tomorrow I have two classes, and Wednesday is this one again. I am tired, but overall, happy. There were no rebellions, and I didn't even need to bringout The Gradebook of Doooooom! so yeah, that was cool.

:P

In other news, as I've been cleaning to make room for the work stuff and give it its own space, I have been organizing my craft supplies. I have been feeling the craft bug lo these many many past nights. I just don't know what I want to make yet. And I am tired and getting silly (getting? I am already there), so I'm done now. How are all of you?
~Sabrina

Doing Something for Myself as a Writer

It's probably no surprise that I like surfing the internet. Actually, it's more like a game of "The Floor is Lava," because I start in the usual spots (my homepage) and jump around from link to the next on my favorites list, occasionally trying a new route (when I Google something or follow a link).

But almost invariably, I start my day with a cup of coffee and the intention of checking email, LJ, facebook, and a few blogs, then glance up occasionally to see the hours whittling away. Ultimately, the day is gone and I have no writing or editing to show for it.

I was rasied Catholic, and still follow some of the traditions. Right now, it's Lent, and usually you give something up for those forty days before Easter. Religion-wise, you do so to bring you closer to that experience of sacrifice. Practicality-wise, it's a good chance to start a new, healthy habit. Usually I give up a certain food, or soda, or do extra exercise (which could be argued is a sacrifice of time and napping). Since it centers on sacrifice of self, sometimes you can squidge it a little towards 'doing more for others.'

This year, I really squidged it, and running with the intention of setting up a better habit, I had planned to write 1,000 words a day, because I'd been having a hard time getting words on a page. That quickly devolved to "well, as long as I have 40,000 words written by Easter." And honestly, that isn't looking very likely right now. I'd also wanted to get a big ol' chunk of editing done on one or two stories, and I haven't made much progress there, either.

Now, I know these aren't impossible goals--I wrote about 50,000 words over the three weeks of winter break when I was writing my Master's thesis--and I know I can have that kind of self-discipline, but I've been lazy and easy on myself. Part of that has been saying I'll get off the computer to write or edit (both by pen and paper right now), then wandering the streets and side alleys of the internet and its World O' Blogs.

So here's my decision/plan: It's a little over a week until Easter, and except for a couple of days, I don't have much to do. Therefore, I will be off the computer from now until, probably, Monday April 5. And if I do go on, it'll be to check my email, little things, but only after I accomplish a significant amount of writing and editing for the day. Maybe say, no computer until after 10 pm, too, so I might just decide it's too late in the day and stay off, get a few more sentences in.

If there's anything people desperately want me to know, I'll check blogs and such after the next week+ for sure.

See you homies on the other side.

Happy Writing,
Sabrina

Maybe I Need Some New Music to Listen to

I haven't been writing nearly as much as I should be, or want to be. Although I didn't sign up for NaNo, I had thought it'd be a good time to jump-start one of the half-dozen story ideas that have been floating around in my head.

Halfway through the month and I've reread, and edited just slightly, the first page and a half of the sequel to the book for which I'm at the querying stage. [Some agents say mention if your book is part of a series, some don't want to know, but the generaly consensus, if there ever is one, seems to be that if you have a sequel planned, it doesn't hurt to work on it while querying the first one.] I've also bought new mini cassettes for my tape recorder, left a few notes on a different steampunky story there, and written a bit more in my Not Another Teen Vamp Story (where the male protag's first encounter with a vampire is nothing romantic and mysterious--I have no idea where it will go, because I want it to be a bit on the violent side, not gratuitously, though, and possibly by the time I'm done with it and have a publisher, YA vamps will be completely off the trend, but they say don't write to trends, and this is what I want to write, so if nothing else, it's practice).

Oy, that got really rather rambly there, didn't it? [Yay alliteration?]

The point is, while I've glanced over some stories and waved hello to them at a distance, I honestly can't say I have any word count to show for the past two weeks. I worked out the numbers and if I want to reach 50,000 by November 30, I should write about 3,333 words every day, which is just over 555 words per hour if I focus on writing for six hours. (Certainly not the entire time I'm at the computer, but a good chunk of time and more realistic than 8-10 hours per day.) 550 looks a lot more manageable than 3,300 words.

The title of this post was a passing thought--maybe some new music might jolt me into a creative spur. But why blame the music? I've completed three novel-length stories since 2006, so I know I can do it. I can have the self-discipline to write for 5+ hours straight. I just need to convince myself to get off my butt and do it. So I make that resolution now. I want to write 50,000 words before December 1.

To do that, I'll probably have to significantly cut down on my blog reading, which has already decreased (I swear, I probably have over a hundred writer, agent and editor blogs bookmarked under my favorites, I could never read them all in a day), but I'll probably disappear from updating CoffeeQuill, LJ, and my facebook as well (the FB games, oh, those time-eaters!). I'd say I'll be back December 1, and you might find me occasionally, but I'll be getting crafty this holiday season, which will also be time-consuming. Let's just call it January, and anything before then is bonus!

All right then, I'm off to try and get some word counts in for today. Any good music recommendations?

Breathing through both nostrils

A short, kind of silly post today. Maggie Stiefvater (author of 'Shiver') posted about numbers.

Number of emails received, comments replied to, harp strings she strung by hand, and randomly, the number of nostrils one breathes through at any one time. The answer is one, which I knew (trivia heard from someone sometime in the past, those pieces of info which you're never quite sure where they came from). But she noted that it's connected to which side of the brain is dominant. Left brain, right nostril, right brain, left nostril. Of course, as she knew readers would, I checked to see which nostril I was breathing.

Apparently my left brain is hard at work right now. [Or at least, it was when I first checked.] So I was thinking, despite my desire to post on this blog, or edit my synopsis, or work on book 2, I had no motivation to do any of it. Perhaps because my creative brain was chillin' at the time. Then I read that and thought I'd post about that.

...Which I didn't do for a while. I still wasn't in the right frame of mind to write anything. I check again, as I finally start writing, and I'm breathing through my left nostril now (right brain woke up).

heh. Just some fun facts/coincidences. Apparently it also goes through two- to four-hour schedules, shifting from one to the other. Maybe I should check throughout the day, whenever I'm breathing through my left nostril, rush to open a Word doc. ;)

October First: Catch-All and Linkage

The countdown begins to my-favorite-holiday-on-which-I-have-nothing-to-do, Halloween. I love Halloween, the idea of dressing up as something magical and maybe a little scary, a night to pretend I'm someone/something else--it's like taking the stories I write a step further.

When I write, I am, in some ways, every character. I need to get in their heads, know how they think, how they react, how they feel. On Halloween, instead of quietly looking over the shoulders' of these fictional characters, I can walk the street as someone else.

@_@

Not to take that idea too far, I just love Halloween.

It's incredibly sad that I never have any plans for the night. Candy for the handful of kiddies that show up, yes, but my family never has parties, none of my friends have parties as far as I'm aware, and I'm not a dance club kind of gal.

But moving on. October 1 also marks the not-quite-midpoint of Banned Books Week, as well as the first day of NaBloWriMo--National Blog Writing Month. Seeing as how I love to read, but have been lax in my CoffeeQuill blogging, I want to attend to these both.

Briefly, a WHAT TO EXPECT:

Tomorrow, I'll post about Banned Books, talk about this year's list, banned books I have or have not read, and share an anecdote from 2003.

Then, it will be my fervent attempt to blog each day of October. I don't imagine I'll keep up the once-a-day post after this month, but if memory serves, it takes about 21 days to form a habit. If I can manage NaBloWriMo, maybe I can manage a more regular posting schedule. I'm already making a list of topics to post on.

LINKAGE

On Publisher's Weekly, there's a vote going on--PW is planning to do an interview with an urban fantasy author, and they want to know which UF author people want to read about. Voting is happening on now, and you can go here to cast your choice. You don't need to log in to leave a comment.

Today also heralds the guest post on "The Charming Bracelet," by "Only Milo" author Barry Smith. Jennifer Ambrose, the author of the blog, is running a Big Idea--a chain letter of sorts, but with a book. Receive it, read it, sign it, blog or tweet it if you like, mail it to someone else. Eventually, the book returns to Jennifer and more writers and readers are aware of a debut author. The book sounds interesting, and you can go to Jennifer's blog for more details about the book, Smith, and her chain book idea.

ETA: While writing about NaBloWriMo, I knew there was one more blog I wanted to mention. By the time I got to Linkage, I forgot. 'Cause I'm a dork like that. Seeing as I love Halloween, and by extension, October, here is a link to Writtenwyrdd's short fiction contest. 500-1,000-word horror story. Halloween as the deadline. Prize is a cuddly Chthulu plushie. I haven't written much horror, but for that, I'm going to give it a try.

(Thanks to Writtenwyrdd for reminding me I wanted to post about this.) :)

So that's October 1, day one of NaBloWriMo. 30 more days to go.

Happy writing,
Sabrina

Schedules and the Day-to-Day

Last night, I was bemoaning the fact that the round of editing I was going through was taking so long. Although I've been known to start wrting at 9 p.m. and keep going until 2 a.m., there are days I edit about three pages and it takes me all day.

Now, those are two somewhat different examples, but in my mind, one reflects a personality I thought I had, that of a writer who can "put butt in chair, work." The other suggests a writer distracted by every single noise and bright light. "Oh, shiny!" I don't want to be the latter. Although, I could excuse it because during the day there's more noise, more things on TV to distract, etc. etc. There are even a couple of guys painting the house and making repairs from 7 in the morning until 4:30 (actually, small applause for them, because we've had maintenance guys who were slow as heck, and we couldn't do anything about it since we're renters and thus, don't hire them, but these are working the whole, sans lunch, and friendly. Yay for them), but they make noise pounding on doors and scraping old paint. But I don't really want to use that as an excuse.

So, this got me wondering if perhaps it's my schedule that's keeping me cut off from my "diligent worker" side.

A lot of writing books will either give the newbie writer specific exercises or suggestions in terms of writing schedules. An hour a day in the morning, before anything else, half an hour in the evening, four hours while "the kids" are at school. Other advice givers say whatever works for you without any suggestions.

I say, in my limited experience, play around with it. Figure out what time you already have free, start there, writing and editing. If you find that's not enough time, see where you can squeeze more. Examine whether that time of day works, and whether that free time can be moved. Try different lengths of time at different times of day, in different places.

When I was at university, I got some writing done on the bus ride to campus (1 1/2 hours usually), and in high school, I got a lot of writing done during recess and lunch (hanging out in front of my friend's English class, or on the outdoor stage). That's where the characters and plot for my first finished novel came. I even started a vampire story with another friend, while walking around the gym on Fridays during P.E. and got fairly far along--filled most of a spiral notebook with that story (Fridays were 'do whatever' in P.E., but we had to do something, if not a sport, then walk around the gym 12 times. I became skilled in walking and writing at the same time).

Now, though, I'm out of school, focusing on the writing, and don't have the added time constraint of a job. And I'm at a loss. During winter break, the 9 p.m. to 2 a.m. slot worked for me, but it doesn't now when I can't relax during the day.

I need to find a new schedule that works for me, because what I have now doesn't.

Which I think is a point most writing books neglect. Your writing schedule can change. There's no rule that says once you become a writer (however you define it for yourself) you have to pick a certain time of day and amount of time and that's what you should stick to in order to be considered a "serious writer." Srsly.

Life gets in the way, our living situations change, and sometimes, you may find a certain time just doesn't work as well for you anymore. Never limit yourself, that should (could) be a writer's credo.

My goal for today, then, is to find a schedule that works for me. I've been slogging through it for the past month, wasting so much time. I don't want to waste anymore. So I'll push through today and see at what time I seem to get the most work done. I'll even stay up late and see if the 9-2 could work for me again. I'll let you know how it goes.

Happy writing.

Not a Morning Person Doesn't Even Begin to Describe It

So says one of my favorite key chains. And it's true. Spending the past 4 weeks writing has changed that fact from joke back to truth. I am not a morning person. I an a night owl, or some other nocturnal creature. My sleep has gone screwy the past week or two. I go to bed 12, 1, 2, then wake up around 10 or 11 in the morning. Ususally I wake up a bit earlier, but I still drowse until that time, the past few days I've actually greeting consciousness at those times. Also, I reguarly go to bed or fall asleep around midnight and haven't had this problem before.

Perhaps it's partly from not needing to wake up early, since I didn't have classes, and then partly the staying up a bit later than usual--the curse of being a nocturnal person living with other people and having my own diurnal schedule. I also like to think it's partly a reaction to a general lack of rest that built up over the semester and summer, though I seem to recall learning doesn't actually happen (it was in a psych class, if people were regualrly deprived of a few extra hours of sleep, only getting 4 or 5 a night, they -didn't- then sleep for a whole day to make up for it).

Anyway, so then I have nights like last night when I went to bed at 2, didn't fall asleep until after 3 and woke up about 10:30 or so this morning. I would've gone to bed earlier, but I got on a roll, some time after 9/9:30. Between about 10 and 2 I wrote almost 3,000, most if not all of the writing I did yesterday in fact. I had a few chores that mornig, but not much, so I could've written much longer earlier in the day, but couldn't find the motivation. Day winding down, others are asleep, and my fingers are tapping like crazy.

Today I didn't even try to write much. I checked my email, LJ, some blogs I like to frequent, then shut down. I ran some errands, came home and booted up the computer intending to write, but my stomach was giving me trouble (I still feel the slightest bit of nauseous, but it's nwhere near as bad as it was this afternoon), so I eventually shut down without typing a single word. so here I am now, having already wasted about an hour online. I'm going to see if I can get another 3,000 words done or so.

I have 98 lines of translation to do tomorrow, but other than that and an hour or so of reorganizing my room for greatest effectiveness when classes start this Wednesday, I will be spending the day writing. I don't think I'll finish the whole plot, but endings take a lot of time for me, so I'll get as far as I can and finish the first draft while editing the beginning. Hopefully there won't be too much overlap. Maybe just a week or two, depending on how big the workload is the first two weeks.

Okay, books don't write themselves, so I'm off. Happy writing everyone.

Blame the One-Armed Man

Job-searching yesterday, so I was MIA from the computer. Written Wyrdd said she writes drafts and posts them over time. I started a draft (not done yet), but I like the idea. For some reason my mind seems to think it's strange, writing an article/essay/blog post not intending to use it right away. Because I'm the same way when I consider writing articles to submit to magazines or websites and the like. Give me a topic and a deadline and I'm good. Write it up and post it immediately (to the point of bypassing a Word doc.) and I'm good. Give me the option to write it up and then wait before seeing it in print/in use, and my mind balks a little.

Very much the "Buh wha--?" reaction.

My brain doesn't always get why the rest of me does something.

It is the second January in 2007. Just shy of the two week point.

Sooo...writing stuff. In a couple of online journals, I've come across writers keeping track (perhaps as a resolution, perhaps 'just because') of their new page count, total page count, new word count for the day, total word count, and details like that. As messy as I am, and a bit of a 'write by the seat of my pants' (another disliked, but now engrained phrase) kinda gal, I like lists. Actually, I love lists. I love little objects and filing systems that can keep me organized. My dad brought me some stiff pale green manilla folder-like folders and I love them, because they're sturdy enough to write on and have plenty of space (I can fit my whole manuscript in one).

Point being, this appeals to me. Usually, when I am writing (still on break right now) I will note the word count of new stuff for that day ~somewhere~, occasionally adding those other details about what the total is for the whole thing. So I may try to note all that in a systematic way (with bold subtitles and all, how keen is that?).

Yes, I know I'm dork. I have a black leather wrist cuff that says so, literally. I'm happily resigned to it (actually, I think I'm happiest when the writing is flowing or I'm giving in to my dorkitude).

At the tailend of my job-searching adventure, I swung by my neighborhood Wal-Mart and scavenged through the scraps of fabrics. Some of those are not tiny scraps at all. I picked up a green leaf print, a pale pale blue, a dark brown with aquamarine dots (small and spaced pretty wide apart so it wasn't too much) and a black fabric with leprechaun and luck symbols (four-leaf clovers, a pipe, horse shoes, etc.). Have no idea what I'll do with any of them, but I just couldn't pass them up. Then I went to the library and got far too many books, most of them research for the writing, that I had to drag home, walking.

Also, my mother is baking brownies. We now have warm gooey brownies and a frosted carrot cake available. The smell is intoxicating.